maiamayhem (maiamayhem) wrote,
maiamayhem
maiamayhem

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goals...and such...

Recent news:

1. I broke up with Shane. Some people are shocked. Others are not. It came down to his alcoholism. I felt like I was living with a 23 year old...oh, wait, I was. He is a great kid...the operative word here being "kid"...very mature in many ways, but still in the "I want to drink every night and do drugs" mode. When I work every day as a site coordinator for a high school, I need my sleep and can't deal with late night parties. I couldn't handle the smells of a drunk coming into bed every night, a couple of hours before I had to wake up for work. His friends would be crashed out all over my house. I was starting to hate him, and I needed to end it. Once again, Shane is a wonderful guy and he was a really sweet boyfriend, but we are just at two different places in our lives, and my nagging at him to get where I was career wise was a fruitless labor. It is best for the both of us.

2. I bought a restaurant. I am not going to go too much into this one. Don't worry. You will all know more, but it is in the Sloan's Lake area, and my ultimate goal will be to build a bar in there, which I will. I am now a school director AND a business owner. If The Absolute Zero takes off like I think we really can, I will have accomplished all 3 of my professional goals. Wooeee!

3. The Absolute Zero commences recording next week. We had a show at the Hi Dive that got cancelled. I was pretty bummed out. We don't have any shows ligned up in the near future, but Baxter is working on it. Playing with Michael, Suzi, and Greg is amazing. I love it. Everyone is so talented, and Greg's stories are so funny. Ask him about how he feels about Bob Dylan some time. It is fucking hilarious.

4. I am now living alone. I LOVE IT! Why I ever got roommates is a mystery to me. I know it is economically advantageous, but SO not worth it. I am a very shy and private person, and I do not enjoy sharing my living space with someone. I loved many parts of living with Shane, but the other roommate was the laziest human being I have ever met, and she never cleaned or got up before 5 pm, so it was kind of hard to deal with. I am a really hard worker. I ALWAYS need to be busy, because of my mind and the negativity that creeps in in idle times, so when I watch people be lazy slugs, I get angry. How anyone can work 3 nights a week for 5 hours at a time, and still feel like they are a successful human being gets to me. I work 60 hours a week, and will be working a lot more with my business, so I tend to judge others' laziness. Maybe I need to ease up on that one.

5. I am starting graduate school next Spring. It is a program for a Masters in Education in Curriculum and Instruction. I have written curriculum at my present job, and I really enjoyed it. Plus, it is a job where I could work from home, and make 50-70k. I make almost 50k now, but I love being in school, and why not add to my debt...mmmhmmmmm! hehe. Seriosly, though, I love being in school, and this program can be accomplished in a year. I think I am going to go all the way and get my Ph.D. Why the hell not?

6. I have started painting and drawing again. I think a break up does that to me. When my first love broke my heart, I did a series of self portraits to chronicle my stages of sadness. As devastated as I was, art and music has always helped me. It is helping me now, and it is beautiful. I want to go to Meininger's after work today so I can pick up some smaller brushes...the painting I am working on now has a lot if very thin lines, and what I am working with now just ain't cuttin' it, bud. I have an idea for a new painting that involves Catholicism and metal hooks. I think I am going to start it tonight...

I am sure it sounds like I am taking on too much (as my mother has said), but I feel really good. Of course I am sad, but getting out of my relationship let me see all the things I have NOT been doing in my life that I know I want to do and will do. So, that is that. I need to work on report cards now.
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